A Therapist’s Tips on Finding the Right Therapist

Setting the Stage for Therapy

I get asked often how to find a “good” therapist. I hear the stories from friends and colleagues alike how difficult it is to find someone who “get’s it.” The bad news is, it is definitely challenging. You are right. It is incredibly hard to find a good therapist. Why is that? Well mental health is only in the beginning stages of being more accepted in Western culture. Until it is more widely validated by our government, insurance companies, and people themselves, therapists will be hard to book. This is due to limited availability and/or the struggle to find a therapist who accepts your insurance.

Know What You’re Looking For

First and foremost, know what you’re looking for! Are you seeking someone who is an expert on OCD? Are you looking for rapid symptom reduction of panic attacks? Are you seeking a major career change? Or are you trying to explore issues within a relationship? You’ll want to know what issues you’ll want to talk about in therapy so that you can find your “best fit” therapist. How do you want your therapist to engage with you? Do you prefer lots of feedback? Do you prefer someone who is mostly focused on techniques and homework? Give some thought to what kind of style you may find comfortable.The more you’re able to identify what you’re looking for, the more efficient your search can be.

Know Your Budget And If You Will Be Using Insurance

I recommend to trusted friends that they first consider the value they place on mental health compared to other expenses such as gym memberships, concert tickets, and other subscriptions that offer a pleasurable or useful service. Once you consider your budget and the value you place on therapy, you can now search for a therapist with that number in mind. If you are planning to use insurance, I suggest calling your insurance company directly and seeing which professionals are in-network. Another option is to go to Psychology Today and select your insurance and browse therapists who have listed that insurance.

Take an Efficient Approach

Reach out to about 10-15 therapists with a simple email asking if they’re accepting new patients and take your insurance/ or ask what their fee is. This is important to do first in order to save yourself precious time and energy. Of that 10-15, maybe 10 will get back to you. Of that 10 maybe only 6 are still taking on new patients, and of that 6 maybe only 3 are within your budget.

Shop for the “Right” Fit

Schedule a 15 minute phone consultation if you can with those 3. This will help you get a sense of who that therapist is, what he/she is like, and how they initially respond to what’s bringing you in to therapy at that time. Then, go with your gut. The good news is, most things in life are never finite. Give your selected therapist at least three sessions to see if this could be an effective, working therapeutic relationship. If you’re really not feeling it, cut your losses. Too many clients spend a lot of time and money with a therapist they don’t truly feel comfortable with. It’s okay to admit that it’s not a good fit. You can always give one of the other therapist’s you spoke to a call and see if they still have availability.

This process can seem time consuming and emotionally exhausting, but it doesn’t have to be. I believe the more we really know what we’re looking for the more efficient we can be in our efforts. Don’t be afraid to reach out if you have questions and be well!